it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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