The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
