would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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