Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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