i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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