Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
We had to coat check the pizza.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize