talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I currently don't understand fingers.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
