sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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