Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Randomize
