Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I'm both gender and math confused
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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