I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
