We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize
