i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
