let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
