My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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