Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
