you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize