do herpes really smell.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
