the new term for farting is butt boxing.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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