so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
