I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Randomize
