i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
