Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
