Pappa wants mamma naked
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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