its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
