My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
