if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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