I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize