Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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