i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
