is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
