you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
if i died would you start the facebook group?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
