I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
