ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
