i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Randomize
