he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
