If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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