I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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