we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
