Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
