Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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