Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
