just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
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