hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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