physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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