Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
operation have a gay friend backfired
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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