I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
