Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Randomize
