so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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