I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
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